(note: glo is "scribe) Since the shakeup over at Boo, (and my royal hissy fit here!) I decided it was time to look for the light at the end on my OWN tunnel for a change, and I think I have found it. (in terms of where it works out best for me to spend my online time and energy, I mean). Since it does speak to larger "meta issues" going on now, I thought I'd share the outcome with you.
You''ll notice my name back on the contributer list here and you will also find me very involved over at ECFS . What you will NOT see me doing, ever again, is considering myself to be a "member" of ANY political blog "community", that is operated on a "top down management model". (Or any other online "community" operated and run by a single "owner".)
I will visit these blogs as I care to, comment as I care to, maybe even contribute something now and then, but I will not be joining any of these "communities." or considering any of them any kind of online "home base" . I really should have known better to ever fall into that trap again.
I take the concept of "community" (or "teamwork" , or "democracy" for that matter) seriously. I don't consent to join anything that I am not willing to invest in. This means freely contributing whatever I have to offer, and getting to really know and care about the other members, because this is my concept of what a "community" is. In return I get a sense of comfort and familiarity and "belonging" as a part of a group of other human beings..that I call a sense of "community". (Sort of like "Cheers": a place where everybody knows your name)
I think I have finally completed a long long lesson. For me, there never will be no more joining any top down, pyramid shaped organization. For several reasons:
1) I AWAYS end up breaking too many of the unwritten, unspoken rules and norms of "acceptable behavior or thought" (that all groups with a top down structure form )
2) I cannot tolerate having subtle yet real limits placed on what I can or cannot say or believe, without getting attacked or "shunned".
3) I cannot witness good people I care about tearing out each others throats out and nobody in charge doing anything about it, not in silence anyway.
4) I will NOT be pressured into taking sides between "insiders and outsiders" and being expected to support those in charge,when I do not agree with them, as the dues I must pay for continued acceptance by the "core community"who is loyal to the owner.
5) And when I am fully "invested" in a top down group, and it falls apart, I tend to get sucked in emotionally, which wreaks havoc with me ,stresswise and raises hell with my objectivity and clarity.
These are all dynamics I have experienced for a lifetime, on the job, in social groups, literally everwhere people organize themselves into groups based on a top down power based model, and I am DONE, hear me?! I am DONE with this! FUCK IT!
I LIKE being an "Other"! I was born with this non conformist nature, and I embrace it fully . At the same time, I am not a an "island", and I do enjoy and need the company of others and that elusive sense of "community", when I can find some of it.
Mo betta is NOT a top down power structured blog. There are several here with admin prvildges and from what I can see, whatever "power" that grants, is flowing in a circular fashion. The same at ECFS. Everyone posting there is in an admin, and so far, it is forming itself into a totally collaborative, circular shape, and flow.
So these are the places where I intend to hang out now, and contribute, for as long as they remain viable in a circular organizational structure. I have long been absolutely fascinated by wondering just what we could do together, if not forced to deal with the inevitable dysfunctions that will always arise in groups operating within a top down, power-over model.
(And I do not find it a surprise at all to find all my most favorite online "Others"right here, and also at ECFS! )
Oh. And for any drop in visitors here, who have been told that we are all bunch of sickos who have no lives at all and spend all our time "blog wrecking" just for the hell of it, you might want to stick around long enough to read all of what's here, not just the carefully selected chum you may have been hand fed.
(And to ductape, wherever you are: I know, I know, it took me awhile to really "get it", fully, but better late than never, huh? Thank you, my dear friend.)